Fighting through it

Sunday, November 14, 2004

Today has been a bit better. The Lions won the Western Finals and are headed off to Ottawa to play in the Grey Cup. We won by a field goal in over-time. BTW that's CFL(Canadian Football League) people!

I had a chance to listen to the game while sitting in our car, waiting for the ferry to bring Mindy back from the Island. As usually they were 45 minutes lates. But for good reason this time. Guess the ferry stopped to help a small craft that was in distress. I can deal with that. Better than being late because they could care less if riders of the ferry have a place to be. Imagine if taxis, buses, skytrains etc were 30-120 minutes late on a regular basis? Wish I worked in a union... Hell I wish I worked at all right now. In a perfect world eh ...

So right now I am researching a drug call Accutane. Used to treat severe acne cases. The side-effects of the drug put me in hospital for a week. Very nearly killed me. Still, after 9-10 years later I am still suffer the effects of it. My shoulder joint physical deteriorated, left me with scarring on my chest, back, shoulders, & face and caused a severe bout of depression. The latter I am doing some research because that was an aspect of my depression which was never looked into. Mainly I am doing it to redeem myself. Though the more and more I research it the more intrigued as to why this medication was never recalled.

From the information I have gathered, though still preliminary, the drug appears to be directly linked to 10 suicides a year in the United States alone. Remember some individuals with severe acne develop low self esteem and then the suicide is considered to be from that. Not only that, linking the two can be different especially if it is not reported. The mood changes that is. Makes me wonder how many have died. My understanding is even the FDA(US based) believes adverse affects(yes, suicide is considered an adverse affect) are reported as low as 1 in 100. Scary thought. Rather than the drug causing the suicidal ideations, mood swings, or phychosis. All of which are side-effects of the drug. Seems only recently that the manufacture changed the warnings to indicate the psychiatric problems it can cause. If I had known that I would have never of agreed to be on it. Bad acne or not.

Hopefully I come up with something good to write about it. Maybe my dr. will give me complete access to my medical file so I can figure out a timeline to all this. Doubt it. Maybe he could look more into it. But I trust his judgement as far as I could throw him. Cheerio,


Medical terminology can cause confusion at the best of times. If there is a word you do not understand all you have to do is double-click on it and the definition will appear! Don't forget to drop me a line by email at with your comments, questions‚ recommended resources‚ concerns‚ & especially your experiences with clusters. Or come find me on my Facebook Profile to add me as a Friend. Whether you are a supporter‚ care-giver or sufferer. I would love to hear from you!

*Please do not use this information for self diagnoses. Writing about my experiences with chronic cluster headaches & epilepsy is a good outlet for me. Consult your Dr. with any kind of headache or chronic pain you may have. The 3rd party links on my site I have found to be a good resource to me over the past few years & dearly hope they will benefit you as well.*

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