Father's Day Eve

Saturday, June 19, 2004


Father's Day. A day I despise, at least feel incredibly depressed on. Not because of my father but but because I am one, at least in the sperm donour sense of the title. Its been over 2 years now! It is hard to feel like a father when you can't see your child. I would like to go to visit her. Or have a family member get court order so they can have access to her without provisions. That way her mother cannot continue to dictate what my family can and can not do with my daughter. However, I don't see them helping me in that sense. Some members of my family have been great with this issue. My daughter is a family member not an a passing phase in life. There's a vent that might get me in trouble. It is the way I feel though.

Today was pretty good otherwise. Went to my sisters/brothers place for a bbq to celebrate one of his friends birthday. I spent most of the time goofing off with my 2 year old nephew. That cheered me up quite a bit. Its almost impossible to be upset when there's a child to play with. When I lived closer I visited him alot. Too bad my moved made everyone so far away. If the drive didn't cause so many attacks I would be there alot more. However, I'm happier out here.

The day was cloud free and hot. Could you believe it, after all the dark, rain filled days people were complaining about it. What do you do with those people? There's no place on Earth they would be happy. Just get them away from me!

I read a half-assed article(I can't find it but when I do I'll post a link) last night that is trying to link clusters attacks with the amount of sunlight in a day, like seasonal depression. I don't really think thats it. To do a thorough job of investigating that. I think one would have to see how many clusterheads there are in sun fill parts of the world. Maybe check parts of the states like Florida and compare them with rain-soaked Vancouver to see if the amount of sufferers is different as well as the frequncy of attacks. Of course the study should have commonalities like age, sex, race and so on. I know I don't feel worse because its dark out. I feel worse because the weather is not constant. I don't care if its always raining or sunny(I prefer the latter for activities), as long as its constant.

Well, thats my rant for tonight, least for the moment. I doubt I'll sleep well so you might be hearing from me again. G'night

A baby is born with a need to be loved - and never outgrows it. - Frank A. Clark


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Medical terminology can cause confusion at the best of times. If there is a word you do not understand all you have to do is double-click on it and the definition will appear! Don't forget to drop me a line by email at versilleus@gmail.com with your comments, questions‚ recommended resources‚ concerns‚ & especially your experiences with clusters. Or come find me on my Facebook Profile to add me as a Friend. Whether you are a supporter‚ care-giver or sufferer. I would love to hear from you!

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