A ClusterHead's Life

I recently realized that I'm going to be out of meds in a few days. Normally that isn't much of a problem. I go in, have a quick chat with my Dr, he writes my prescription(s) and then I'm out of there till next month. However, this time I don't have a vehicle. My girlfriend's car has developed an ever growing hole on one of the metal radiator hoses. Needless to say, driving an hour to see my GP is not going to happened. And my car is collecting dust because I don't have the money to get it fix or insured. I know, I know. I should find a Dr. out here in Vancouver. I mean why not? All the specialists seem to be out here. Why not the GP's? I am just hesitant about changing. It has taken so long to get the 'right' combination of knowledge & medicine to make daily living somewhat bearable. Everytime I see someone new they have the compulsive need to change everything just to see what happens and then of course we go back to what it was originally. To top it all off not my Dr.'s want patients with chronic illnesses especially if it's non-malignant. I'm not sure of the logic of that. Maybe someone could explain that to me. Now Back to my dilemma. I can't take the bus. No car. No friends that what to head out that way. I may as well be on a deserted island. If stopping the medication wasn't going to have a horrible effect I would care too much. All I know is that it won't be pleasant. A month or so ago I ran out of Celexa(citalopram hydrobromide) for 10 -11 days and there was an noticeable increase in pain. Felt like I had mild case of the flu expect my body was going through it and my mind was just there. Sort of like looking through curved glass. And this med will be even harder. The demon finds a way to get you over a barrel every chance it gets eh.

The weather still hasn't been co-operating with me. It was supposed to be nice and hot all week. Now there is rain, clouds and everything in between in the focus. But it'll change, again, tomorrow I'm sure of it. Here's looking a hoping!

I'm going to run off to bed and hope the bad news(more on that when I'm able to deal with it) doesn't keep me up with nightmares. If it does I'll be back here. G'night

Paul

Everything that is new or uncommon raises a pleasure in the imagination, because it fills the soul with an agreeable surprise, gratifies its curiosity, and gives it an idea of which it was not before possessed.
-Joseph Addison
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