Endless Hell

Thursday, October 14, 2004


Last week has been completely detremental to my psyche. Clusters galore. All thanks to holiday travelling. Least thats when they started. Most likely they were cause by a combination of things. The long drives. Preseratives in the food. Excess stress. The change in weather. So on and so forth. To make matters worse, the apartment right across the street is having it's roof done. I can't even open my mouth without tasting tar. Yuck! Let's see. I'm screwed when I have a cluster and the moment it goes away, my nose & eye stop running then take a deep breathe of the heavily polluted air, then bang! Here comes another. Enter four letter word here --> ! Not to mention fighting the demon so often has got me exhausted. But no matter how much I sleep I cannot acheive the rested feeling I know and love. Bugger huh?

Today hasn't been so bad. The shadows lingered a bit this morning but all and all it has been a some what decent day. The 'why me' syndrome has thankfully faded. Later on I even had the energy to change the furniture around. And for no good reason! :) I know Mindy hates it but I have to have something to do now that my monitor has crapped out on me.

Now Mindy and I are sharing her computer. That is part of the reason I haven't written too much lately. I don't really like using other people's computers. Not sure why. Maybe I feel like I'm taking it over. I don't know. Just the way it is I suppose.

My internet was disconnected briefly today 'cause I'm behind in my payments. Why does my money go? Seems that the bills have wings and escape whenever possible. I hardly use it for pleasure, sometimes for food. Alot on gas. I owe Mindy a bit of money for helping me out with buying my computer but it is nothing exuberant. Time to keep a tight lid on my wallet. That won't last now that I have to buy a new monitor.

I did write Viewsonic and explained what happened with the sparks. Monitors should not spark! Regardless of age. I think mine is only 5 years old. It's out of warranty but I am hoping Viewsonic will look deep into their corporate hearts and help me out. Worth a shot :).

Maybe I'll have to end up selling my car. Anyone want a '86 Mercury Topaz? Awesome for parts. Engine is in good working order. Needs new glass, power windows don't work and that's all I can think of right now.

Paul

Egotism is the anesthetic that dulls the
pain of stupidity
-Frank Leahy

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Medical terminology can cause confusion at the best of times. If there is a word you do not understand all you have to do is double-click on it and the definition will appear! Don't forget to drop me a line by email at versilleus@gmail.com with your comments, questions‚ recommended resources‚ concerns‚ & especially your experiences with clusters. Or come find me on my Facebook Profile to add me as a Friend. Whether you are a supporter‚ care-giver or sufferer. I would love to hear from you!

*Please do not use this information for self diagnoses. Writing about my experiences with chronic cluster headaches & epilepsy is a good outlet for me. Consult your Dr. with any kind of headache or chronic pain you may have. The 3rd party links on my site I have found to be a good resource to me over the past few years & dearly hope they will benefit you as well.*


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